It was a night for the ages, as the brilliance of Frank Sinatra and Sammy Davis Jr. were channeled through celebrity mentor Jamie Foxx? No, I'm not making this up. It was an American Idol you had to see to believe, or you can watch my recap instead!

And when you're done there, don't forget to click on over to Curt Wagner's Show Patrol blog for RedEye. He live blogs every episode, and thinks I'm way to hard on Kara. So please, click over and tell him how wrong he is.

Results tonight, and I'll see you all right here next week.

Didn't disco die a long time ago at Comiskey? Well, our American Idol contestants did their best to bring it back last night. Why? Who knows. But at least it gave America a chance to see what I would look like with an afro. My predictions on who's going home tonight are in my recap below. Enjoy!

And for photos of last night's performances, check out the Idol Gallery.

It's going to be the summer of hair for NBC. Access Hollywood says former American Idol finalist Sanjaya Malakar will be another contestant on "I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Outta Here."

Joining Sanjaya will be former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich, along with Geraldo Rivera, Dog the Bounty Hunter, and Spencer and Heidi from "The Hills." The show kicks off on NBC June 1st.

I was getting my Blago "dead-racoon-do" ready, but I might have to shake it into a Sanjaya mohawk. Here's a refresher in case you're new to Earth:

First up, Quentin Tarantino is one of my favorite directors, so when I found out that he was going to be a celebrity mentor on the show I couldn't believe it. Also, it made me feel a little less ashamed to be so obsessed with this particular TV program. Yeah, Quentin's a little nuts, but aren't we all sometimes? Speaking of crazy, watch my recap of last night's Top 7 performances....

And for more photo, check out last night's performance gallery.

Tuesday night's American Idol was as beautiful as a newborn baby - literally. You'll want to see my recap if you caught the show, and especially if you missed it. Who's in my bottom three? Who's going home? Who cares? Find out now!

And when you're done with that, be sure to check out my favorite Idol recapper on the web - RedEye's Curt Wagner, a.k.a. the Show Patrol. You can find his Top 8 Recap here.

American Idol's Top 9 faced off in Hollywood last night, and I watched it all right here in Chicago. I'm proud to announce that my Emmy nominated American Idol Video Recaps are back, but I'm not to proud to say that last night's episode didn't give me too much excitement to work with. Maybe Paula will end up under the table again next week. Oh well, enjoy and behold who will be in the bottom 3, and who will get eliminated.....

Greetings from paradise! That's right, I'm writing this recap from the sunny shores of Cancun, Mexico! This easily makes me the most devoted Idol recaper alive. Thanks for reading.

Tonight the contestants will be singing the hits of Motown. Last week I pegged the bottom two correctly, although America once again got it wrong by sending Alexis Grace home and hanging on to Michael Sarver. Who will be going home tonight? Here we go!

Nothing says St. Patrick's Day like Randy Travis, right? What's a matter Idol producers, couldn't get Bono on the line? Randy was here (and looking a little upset) to try and teach our contestants how to put a little twang in their tune. My best, good, and just plain ugly singers....after the jump!

The hour that will "change the lives" of 13 people. Gag me. Let's live blog tonight's American Idol Results Show!

All day people have been buzzing about these "new rules" the judges are going to announce tonight. We know they're kicking off two contestants, but they're promising something even bigger. Let's break it down - here we go!

An unlucky number. A new stage. An embarrasing entrance for the judges. And the music of Michael Jackson. It was the first big night of American Idol (did I mention they have a new stage?). The Top 13 faced off and sang the difficult tunes of M.J.

"Will he come and help the contestants?" my wife asked.

"I think there might be some kind of law against that," I answered.

My best, good, bad, and just plain ugly after the jump!

I'm sorry y'all, but I'm coming down with a horrible cold and a raging fever, probably from the Watchmen screening I just sat through. Anyways, I will be back and STRONGER than ever next week, when if all goes well, my Emmy-nominated American Idol Video Recaps will return. *Cue Angelic Hum Sound.* See you then, *cough.*

Hello again everybody! After a brief break due to some guy giving a speech in Congress, American Idol is back on the air! I'll be hanging out with you LIVE blogging during the broadcast, so keep up with my thoughts after the jump!

This....

*Touch hair and make stupid face*

Now that we're past Ryan Seacrest's prompter notes, it's time to break down the results of the first group of 36. 24 million votes poured into American Idol headquarters last night, but was your favorite contestant booted? And how right was I on my picks? Find out after the jump!

The American Idol live shows are finally here....with a TWIST! See if you can follow me here. The Top 36 have been broken down into three groups of 12. The highest vote of the men will move on. The highest vote of the women will move on. And one wild card will move on. That gives us 9 spots. The remaining contestants will compete in a Wild Card round, where the top 3 will move on, making our Top 12. Thanks for making Season 8 much easier to understand, American Idol.

It was the first LIVE broadcast of the season, and there were more than a few strange occurances, including Ryan Seacrest being barked at by a producer.

They gave her chances like she was playing Monopoly, but Joanna Pacitti has gone bye-bye. The AP just released a short note saying "American Idol" has disqualified Pacitti, but they haven't said exactly why yet. The judges already made it VERY clear on the show that Pacitti had a record deal in the past. Maybe she forgot to mention something else, just like she forgot all of her lyrics during Hollywood week.

Congratulations to Felicia Barton of Virginia Beach, VA, who will replace Joanna on the show.

Welcome to the judges mansion, better known as Simon Cowell's vacation home! It was the last night in Hollywood, where our contestants sit in a chair and are told whether or not they've made it onto the live telecasts. This year "Idol" will feature a Top 36. But before they get there, some of the contestants were subjected to "final sing-offs." It's a ploy to add more drama and (hopefully) more singing to an otherwise sterile episode.

If you're an "Idol" junkie, you know the list of the Top 36 leaked weeks ago (as if they didn't have these people picked since audition day). But just for fun - let's break down the WINNERS, the LOSERS, the SING-OFFS, and my TOP 36 THOUGHTS!

Ladies and gentlemen...we may already have a winner! It's the dreaded "herd the hopefuls into the slaugtering room night." The contestants were put to a final test. After performing in front of the judges one last time, all 72 singers were rounded up into four different rooms. Then, the judges gave the news as to who stays and who goes. There was a little bit of singing - just enough to put together my BEST, WORST, and final verdict.

"American Idol" producers figured something out - group work sucks. Welcome to Hollywood Group Night, easily the biggest drama to go down every season. We get to see how our favorite (or not so favorite) contestants react when they have to rely on each other. It was a night of music, meltdowns, and plenty of teases about meltdowns coming up later. Let the catfight begin and the excuses fly with my BEST, WORST, and FINAL VERDICT!

"This will no doubt be the most important day or your life." - Simon Cowell to the contestants on the opening of Hollywood Week.

Easy there Margaret Thatcher. It's a reality show singing contest, not the Battle of the Bulge. But getting serious, Hollywood Week is my favorite portion of "American Idol," and I was excited to see all the changes. They let the contestants sing whatever they wanted acapella. They gave them voice coaches and stylists. And they even brought Barry Manilow back from whatever planet he was on, to help them become as weird as possible.

My BEST, WORST, and FINAL VERDICT after the jump!

Tonight's "American Idol" pitted New York against Puerto Rico. It's your regular "West Side Story," but with a crazy rocker in retro hipster sunglasses. Only in Ah-meer-ee-kah!

Now I have to mention how stupid I am. I completely forgot "American Idol" was on tonight, something more than one of you readers pointed out after my "see you next week" line on Wednesday. You have my deepest apology....but keep reading for my BEST, WORST, OBAMA, and FINAL VERDICT!

Welcome to Utah, the friendliest place on Earth! Where's Mitt Romney when you need him? Tonight "American Idol" invaded the hometown of David Archuleta, and they found a few special singers who might make it just as far. That said, it's time to put these formulaic audition shows to bed - for GOOD! The bad singers aren't as humorous, the post-production gags are all getting stale, and the judges' antics are about as exciting as a night in, well, Utah.

Keep reading for my BEST, WORST, OBAMA WINNER and FINAL VERDICT.....

All season long, “American Idol” has showcased stories of hope, inspiration, and vomit-inducing upliftness. No, it’s not a word. Tonight, that would all change, because “American Idol” took the show to Jacksonville. That’s right – there would be no OBAMA AWARD winner for “hope and inspiration” tonight. Instead, we got more weird moments with the judges, a few GREAT auditions, and the rebirth of the flat top. Let’s get to my breakdown of THE GOOD, THE BAD, and my FINAL VERDICT.

Howdy, y’all! “American Idol” went down to Lou-uhl-ville, Kentucky and found a few good singers, some strange birds, and apparently a guy in a port-a-potty. So before you ask why I wasn’t watching “Lost,” let’s get to my BEST, WORST, OBAMA AWARD WINNER, and FINAL VERDICT!

Welcome to your Inauguration Night American Idol Recap! This season, “Idol” producers promised us “change we can believe in,” meaning they were going to show us more “good” talent and stop promoting the train wrecks. Well, let’s hope our new Commander-In-Chief is a little bit better with his word. On the one-hour San Francisco audition night spectacular, “American Idol” breezed through a few yellow tickets, and spent most of the time on the biggest freaks in flower town.

Keep reading for my BEST, WORST, and the winner of the coveted OBAMA Award!

RYAN SEACREST: What happened? No ticket?

CHELSEA: No ticket. They said I sound like a cat falling off a roof or something.

Ladies and gentlemen, this is why I love “American Idol.” The second audition night kicked off with waitress Chelsea Marquardt, a cute little blond with a cat caught in her throat. Then there was the even more attractive Casey Carlson, a self-confessed “bubble tea maker” who managed to con the judges with her weak take on a Vanessa Carlton hit. Overall, it was a pretty embarrassing night to be a sorority girl in the audition room.

I will say that tonight’s episode was a big improvement, mostly because we had less of Kara being crammed down our traps. But still, too many judges too little time. This show works best when Simon is allowed to shine. Facebook poster Andrew puts it best:

“The entire 2 hours should be the inner monologue that Simon gets when he gets "the look" in his eyes when he realized he'll be able to market the "talent" in front of him: "Ahh yes, a blind--yet cute, not scary Andrea Bocelli gazed--curly haired, piano playing young lad--genius! {que sound effect: cha ching!}" I only watch the show for that look. He's a genius."

Simon had that look more than a few times tonight. My BEST, WORST, and FINAL VERDICT after the jump!

If Episode 1 of Season 8 is any indication, it’s time we replace the term “jump the shark” with “add a judge.” “American Idol” finally pulled back the curtain on Kara “Khemistry Killing” Dioguardi. Watching the episode, I felt I was witnessing history. Analysts will someday look back at this tape as the day “Idol” finally threw on the waterskis and let her rip! The show spent WAY too much time introducing another unnecessary voice, another person to suck valuable time away from Simon Cowell.

It was also the first post-Obama “Idol,” packed full of buzzwords like “hope,” “courage,” and “strength.” This year will feature young chicks in bikinis, right next to 16 year olds who create charities for seniors. Seriously, do you want proof that we’re not in another Great Depression? A 16 year old with enough time and financial support to create her own charity also has time to audition for “American Idol.”

My full breakdown is right after the jump....